Friendships and Relationships

Hut Happenings–

Published on by Kathy Baker

From the fifties to the seventies, the “Loon” newsletter included the activities each session from each hut. Each cabin would contribute a few sentences, and the compilation of the different years added up to a diary (of sorts ) for the camp experience.

There was backwards day, tin can stove making on the rifle range, a banquet with entertainment, a historical parade and bragging rights from Hut 7 in 1950 when the entire cabin earned their blue caps in swimming. One hut hosted a fortune telling booth at the camp carnival in the lodge during another session that summer, while another had the distinction of having no Bay City girls in their hut.

There were cracker box sessions, where you could ask the counselor anything, and pennants for neat tables, hours of canasta on rainy days, scavenger hunts and marshmallow roasts. Girls bemoaned the fact they couldn’t get fires started on their cookstoves, or laughed when they had to sidestep cows on the path to Hale Park for their outing.

Some huts that summer bragged about the fact they all took tap dancing or arrived on the same bus to camp. Others were sad that their frogs did not win the frog contest, due to not being in top shape. Rain spoiled some activities, but inside the chains were finished for the Christmas in July tree. Jean Robinson’s mother had a cake sent up for her birthday to share with her cabin mates, and Jan Mosier and Shirley Miller won prizes for being the best dressed babies on Baby Night.

Gab sessions, tales of the Moms who attended, singing, hut rearranging, and gossip about the girls who were on a diet, counselors who missed their beaus and the girls who fell asleep early were topics in the newsletters. The girls wrote about how well they made friends and how energetic and contented they were.

In 1951 two campers from a hut had to have shots at the doctor’s office and when they stepped outside one of their friends was spotted riding a spotted black and white mare named Belle! One hut never had to get acquainted with each other, as they already knew each other! Others wrote of eating dinner in their canoes. Another hut had seven counselors in training—Ann Gunn, Pat O’Tool, Pat Parsons, Karen Temple, Jean Robinson and Judy Miller—all involved in creating the 16-18 ft. birch front gate sign.

Hut 9 had a “Hate Hut 9 Day” in which they said nothing but nasty things to each other, followed by a “Love Hut 9 Day”, where they expressed nice things. One hut in 1952 could not get over their counselor nonchalantly picking up spiders. Hut 2 laughed about going home with Texas accents with Chris as their counselor, while Hut 10’s claim to fame was three CIT’s—Nan O’Tool, Marsha Immerman and Shirley Blunden.

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Journey Of A Camper On Drugs

Published on by Kathy Baker

D had fond memories of her seven summers as a camper at Maqua in the mid-60’s. After the first few years, she would stay for all four sessions. Her last summer at camp was spent as a kitchen aid in the early 70’s. She described herself as mischievous back then, but she got along with everyone. She still had friends who were campers and could not wait to return the following year.

“For some reason, the new director took an instant dislike to me. I do not know if it was my personality or something else she had heard. During a break between sessions, ten of us went back to M’s cabin where we all smoked marijuana, some for the first time. I’d tried marijuana previously and even had some at camp with me, but never smoked it in camp.”

“When I applied to be a junior counselor for the following season, the director denied me. I was devastated. I adored going there. I had the best childhood and Maqua was a big part of it. The relationships were so great and even the staff didn’t snub us as kids. I loved that we were doing stuff all the time. I had wonderful relationships with Dorthe and Beanie and others, and stayed in touch with many of them. Those relationships were a uniting force.”

“Maqua was life transforming for me. It was like a little dream come true. Going to the reunion in 2012 was very healing for me. I realized then what a loss I’d been carrying around all these years. I had assumed I would be coming back as a junior counselor after the summer as a kitchen aid. When I was denied, I felt like my arm had been chopped off. We all had so much in common and it wasn’t anything to do with our parents being friends or our friendships back home. It was about the special camp relationships.”

“The denial of the junior counselor position coincided with the beginning of twenty-five years of active addiction. By the age of fifteen, besides marijuana, I had already experimented with many different types of drugs. When I told some of the staff at the reunion, they told me they wished they’d known, so they could have helped. But, no one could have helped at that time.”

“Despite my addiction, I was always a good student. After receiving my Bachelor’s degree, I moved to California and tutored math at a community college for a while. Ultimately, I went to law school in California, still heavily into drugs, but I took the bar exam and passed it. I got high right after my swearing in.”

“Staying in school seemed like the easiest course since my parents were willing to continue paying for everything. I did use my law degree and ran a clinic for substance-abusing women, and also worked for the local Family Court restraining order clinic. I won awards for my pro bono work. I was telling myself I was a functioning addict until one day I realized I’d made an oversight in a situation that could have affected someone else’s life. So, I stopped practicing. My fallback was to return to school again for my Masters in Public Interest Law.”

“In the early 90’s, my father passed away. Because my Mom and I were so close, I moved back to Michigan. I was struggling, so I entered into grief therapy, which ultimately turned into substance abuse therapy. Eventually, I went to inpatient treatment at Hazelden and got clean. Now I am doing what I always wanted to do.”

“I have my masters in social work, work as a substance abuse therapist and most importantly, I’m in recovery. I just celebrated twenty years clean. Looking back over those twenty-five years of active addiction, there were many difficult times. I spent time in jail and came close to death several times. Basically, my life at that time was about using.”

“The trajectory of my life has been unusual, but I feel that I somehow landed on my feet. I believe I am more whole as a person and I understand that life is about relationships. It came full circle at the reunion and I realized the friendships I developed while at Maqua truly helped to shape my life.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

Bra Or No Bra?

Published on by Kathy Baker

Every girl probably remembers the first time they had to change in front of someone other than a sister, step into a communal shower after a gym class, shop for their first bra, or the shock that someone could be the same age as flat-chested you and have the hugest breasts you had ever seen!

“I had never spent the night at anyone’s house. I knew no one,” said Geraldine Padgett (1954-56). “I had no friends at camp and the other girls were not from my area. One of the biggest things for me was changing clothes in front of girls! In those times, you didn’t even lounge in your pajamas and we showered alone. I had never dressed in front of people and I was very modest.”

“I do remember, just as my friends did, that we all wanted to be around when one girl was putting on her bra. Her boobs would fall into the cups and then she would just snap it on and pull up the straps. We had never been around girls who were not modest. I think we bothered her “laughed Dorothy Niedzielski (1946-47).

Pat Kula said the memory of her early forties bra story at camp still brings howls of laughter to her bunkmates that witnessed the same act of the girl with the biggest boobs stepping into her bra from the floor. There was not much room for privacy for the girl who was cups ahead of her flat-chested roommates!

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Confusions and Confessions–

Published on by Kathy Baker

 

“I was somewhat aware and in denial at the same time, while I was at camp and in those college years, of my sexuality,” admitted L.D, who was at camp in the late sixties. “I had a boyfriend, but wasn’t really all that interested in him. One of the other counselors eventually made me talk about it, but she did it in a nice way. I think they all knew at camp, but I waited several years before I came out.”

For some, like K.M., who was just a hugger during the same era, and had no confusion, it was the summer of awareness for her. “I loved that I could walk around camp with my arms wrapped around another girl or arms linked, appropriately, and no one cared. I could hold hands swinging and feel comfortable. I don’t remember ever having any girl crushes, but I do remember the summer there was a rumor about another girl liking another girl and I just never knew anything about those things. We just never talked about sexuality.”

One woman in the early sixties had applied for the job as a college student from an ad in the Bay City Times. Having passed her water safety instruction classes through the Red Cross, she felt she could write her own ticket for a summer job, knowing WSI instructors “were hard to come by”. Her degree was in physical education from a college in Illinois and she had been a counselor at a Girl Scout camp and a Pioneer Girls camp in the Poconos.

She felt her summer with her waterfront job was fine until the last day, when she alleged her director made sexual advances toward her. She was to help with the last day’s closing-up of Camp Maqua, but told her she refused to help her and if she said one word about it, she would report the incident to the Bay City “Y”. In a second interview, she felt she did the right thing not reporting, as she had not noticed the director had ever been inappropriate with the young girls.

“I didn’t know about lesbianism at that time. I probably should have reported her to the school system in Detroit, where she worked as a physical education teacher, but I never did. She was a cold, strict woman who you could not talk to. I was OK with my decision not to report her.”

She spent six weeks at Camp Maqua and then walked away, but as a professed introvert, she stated she had never been close to any of the other counselors. “The best part of that summer was working with the kids. I lived above the boathouse and would wander around and talk to different groups of kids. It was okay until the last day.”

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Gays And Girl Crushes—

Published on by Kathy Baker

K.W. knew there were crushes on counselors in the sixties and that many of the girls “would show you theirs if you showed them yours and they would giggle and dance around in their underwear, but it was a time when they didn’t talk about women liking women. My friend was a tomboy and there were many tomboys. We instinctively knew who they were and they were the ones we asked to climb the trees to get us things, just as we knew who the girly girls were. By the time I was in fifth grade, girls were popping boobs and getting their periods and we had our medical forms and our check ups and I’m pretty sure the camp nurse was a pretty important person.”

Alternately, J.B. was aware of the strong female friendships at camp, even during the co-ed years and realized looking back around 25% of the women might have been gay, which did not cause problems unless they broke up with each other. “It wasn’t a big deal and there was no sexual tension, but there were the tightest knit friendships made in the shortest amount of time at camp.”

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Not Out In The Open—

Published on by Kathy Baker

“I know there were girls at camp that had feelings for other girls and counselors, but it was a time that if you had those feeling, you kept them to yourselves. It is not so socially taboo anymore, but back then, you kept your feelings in check,” admitted A.C., from the late sixties and early seventies, who met her good friend at camp. She recalled staying up ridiculous hours talking to her friend in an intense and intimate way, admitting she was attracted to her as a friend.

D.R. had a crush on one of the counselors in the early seventies. “There was not a lot of talk about gay issues and I was a tomboy, but not gay. I wasn’t athletic or into sports, but until my brother came along, my Dad had me cutting the lawn and doing the sfuff with the dogs, etc. But, I can remember all the counselors were at a campfire and my three cabin mates went on a tangent trying to make me mad, saying things about (my crush). I defended her and then I started to cry and the counselors had to yell at them. I still don’t know why I did that.”

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